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A Cowboy in a Desert of My Own (feat. The White Pube)

from The Portrait Peels (Off) by Shadow Grew a Body

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    C54 red transparent cassette with full coverage on-body printing on both sides of the tape and audio recorded, supplied in clear case with printed two-sided j-card. Merch artwork is digital representation only. All proceeds will go towards the completion of an accompanying hand-drawn animation that will be released later in 2021.

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lyrics

I love the position I’m in now
I wouldn’t trade if in for anything in the world
I’m becoming more and more comfortable in this identity

My god, I spent my teenage years feeling trapped
Starving just so I could feel the power and control
Afforded by brutal refusal

I’ve been like seven different people since then

It feels less like lying when I walk into a room and introduce myself
I’m finally free
A cowboy in a desert of my own

This is a point in time
A stopgap
A weird soft panic

We’ve always benefitted from these moments where we just stop
Breathe
Even if only for a second

I’m beginning to feel a weird kind of déjà vu about all
Or maybe it’s accountability
Maybe the metaphor of me being a cowboy here is actually really quite apt
Because we’re writing on the frontier of our own experience
And we just got to go it alone together
Ride till we can’t no more

Maybe I slow it all the fuck down

I think I just need to shift the weight onto another foot for a while
I’m glad to have entered into this identity
Even if it was only ever accidental

I’m free, free on my horse in this wild, wild west
Arms spread, chest open to the burning orange sun
Solitary in the sky

credits

from The Portrait Peels (Off), released January 1, 2021

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Shadow Grew a Body

art pop & experimental animation project

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